Friday, August 26, 2011

Random Dungeon Encounter Table By Barking Alien


Snarky humor is in effect. Those with sensitive or weak constitutions should exit the theatre for this performance. 

I don't mean to be a jerk with this post...but I can't help it. The need has arisen in me and I have to let it out. So, without further ado...
A Random Dungeon Encounter Table By Barking Alien Things you might meet in a given room of a dungeon...

Say it's been around 12-15 sessions or adventures since your PC party has visited a dungeon and either they or you have decided it's about time for one (it could happen). Now, assume that for whatever reason, even though you've decided a dungeon will appear in this next session, you haven't thought about what will be contained in it. That is, you haven't thought about or decided how to stock your dungeon. I don't know, maybe you've been drinking or staying out late with the guys or your special lady and just haven't had time to devote to your game. First, shame on you. Second, we've all been there (well ok...not me...but I'm sure someone has).

This is the chart I would use for myself if I were running a D&D type game and needed to determine what was in any given dungeon room. This chart uses a D20, 1-20, since I would probably have a D20 on me. Not a D30, as that would be completely useless in 100 out of 100 games I generally run.

Here goes...

01- Come up with something.

02- Make up a Monster. I mean jeez Adam, you've been reading monster books for 30+ years. You can't think of a monster? Go collect stamps you numb-nut.

03 - Take a cool trap from a movie and tweak it a bit. How many damn movies have you seen? See 02!

04- Someone is imprisoned here. Name them. Just name them. You know people the players don't know. Take two names and combine them you lazy wad.

05- A classic monster you really like is guarding a magic thing. I don't know, a thing. A spear, an amulet, a bag. Does it matter? It's frickin' random. If you cared you would have made something up before hand and not needed this chart.

06- Two monsters. That'll freak them out.

07- Oh man, remember that neat medieval looking robot from that one Anime your boy Rob showed you? Yeah that. That's in there. And like 100 pieces of gold or something.

08- Door opens, overstuffed closet gag from Hanna Barbera cartoons. Complete with basket ball and skis.

09- Door opens to the tavern scene from last week's adventure. Step through, go back in time and relive that session. What're you bitchin' about? It's not like you spent time coming up with something for this one.

10- A Dragon. A frickin' huge Dragon. He won't attacked. He is wearing glasses, looking at blueprints and trying to figure out how in the hell he got into this room.

11- Door opens to reveal 3 additional, optional random charts. Now the fun begins.

12- Door opens to space. Outer space. Stars. The Void. No Air. PCs are propelled out of the corridor and into space by explosive decompression like someone just opened an airlock. TPK! You the man!
Brag to all your DM buddies.

13- The room is painted green. Green walls, floor, ceiling, etc. There are chairs in it. If the party enters, closes the door and sits in the chairs, the door will reopen after a minute and a man in odd garb will tell the PC closest to the door that he is on in 10 minutes, right after the commerical. The door then closes and doesn't reopen. Nothing further happens.

14- Door opens, room explodes. I love explosions.

15- As 14 but room waits until all PCs have entered.

16- As 14 but room is empty. Hallway the PCs are standing in explodes.

17- Room is circular and contains a fountain in the center filled with water. I don't know. Water weird or elemental I guess. Something watery.

18- Remember the last time you did a cool dungeon room with a different group? Yeah? Good, do that.
They'll never know.

19- A group of 1D8 goblins, with 1D6 visual differences from regular goblins, with 1 of 4 (1D4) different weapons. Let's waste as much time on this as possible.

20- Seriously? You need 20 of these things? Dude, COME UP WITH SOMETHING! Lazy jackanape.

I can be a little hard on myself.

My apologies to the blogosphere at large. While I do not personally like or use Random Charts in my games, I have seen a number of GMs use them to excellent effect (though not often in my experience). Now back to some serious smurfing...

Barking Alien


  1. Jolly good fun. lol'd at several of these but 16 is my fav. :)

  2. Thanks Ze. I like it when stuff goes boom!