It doesn't exist. Thank goodness.
I shall rue the day the game that is Perfect for me is created.
I won't need to blog anymore that's for sure. At least not about RPGs.
I won't have the need to purchase another game ever again and on the plus side, they'll be no more lamenting that there isn't anything I want to buy.
Boy oh boy, the Perfect game.
Reminds me of a gag from our old Teenagers from Outer Space campaign, Blast City Blues.
One of the PCs wants to impress this girl. He finds out her birthday is coming up and decides he's going to get her the perfect thing. While he talks to her friends to find out what she likes and/or needs, an alien with a fedora and a trench coat comes up to the other PCs.
Trenchcoat Alien: "Psst Hey buddy, c'mere. {Whispering} I hear yer pal is lookin' for sometin' special for his goil. Da Perfect Thing."
PC #2: "Um...yeah."
Trenchcoat Alien: "Well I jus' so happen to have it. Right here."
I mime flashing the inner, left side of a coat.
PC #3: "What is it?"
Trenchcoat Alien: "Whattaya mean, 'What is it?' It's da Perfect Thing. It's perfect ya understand? It's just the right size, her favorite color, it's exactly what she's hoping to get."
PC #2: "The Perfect Thing."
Trenchcoat Alien: "Riiight. Just 1000 credits."
PCs #2 & 3: "1000 Credits?!"
Trenchcoat Alien: "Shhh! Yeah. That's a steal for this thing. It's Perfect."
Turns out the never fully described 'Perfect Thing' is an object, a...well...thing...that transmogrifies itself into that which the holder desires most. Place it in a gift box, hand it to someone, and when they open it the box will contain their heart's true desire.
The catch?
First, each perfect thing only works once, then it sets permanently into it's new form. The first person to get it and imprint upon it determines it's form (think Gozer, the Destructor from Ghostbusters. If your mind is blank and you're not thinking about anything at all, it doesn't become anything).
These items were extremely rare, found only on some long, lost planet near the center of the galaxy.
Additionally, the Trenchcoat Alien stole it from some collector. The original owner has sent people to get it back, a bunch of alien warriors wanted it, a villain stole it from the PCs to figure out it's secrets, and a rival for the gal's affection wanted to get it first.
So yeah. The Perfect Thing. Maybe it'll someday magically appear and turn into whatever game I need it to be at that moment.
Or not.
AD
Barking Alien
I agree with you BA (I know that's a shock) - it's a hypothetical ideal. The perfect game for running Star Trek is unlikely to be the perfect game for running a game about gritty fantasy or Star Wars. Even within a specific genre, there may be multiple games that really feel right for it. I like d6 for Star Wars for a lot of things but I like the final d20 version too and I'm even coming around on the FFG funky-dice version too. Same with Trek - I like FASA but I like LUG Trek too. I don't think we need a "perfect game" and that's just fine.
ReplyDeleteI've never been a fan of one-size-fits-all. I don't tend to like 'generic' systems. I feel like each game's mechanics should be designed for the type of game it is intended to be used for.
ReplyDeleteSure, some systems will work for multiple game genres, and subjects, but as you noted, Toon isn't right for a brutal, and bloody game set during the Vietnam War.