For Question #8 the deep seated Kelvin Green hits me with an inquery that can only be answered by telling a very personal story so grab a tissue, hold a loved one, and get ready for this Hallmark Holiday Special.
Unless you're a Vulcan or an Android. Then by all means carry on as usual.
Was there a time when you stopped playing rpgs or "fell out of love" with them? What brought you back?
In 1995, on my third day of work at an Anime and Asian Pop Culture Entertainment store in New York, my boss took me aside to tell me that the young lady who'd just walked in was one of their best customers so far (they'd only been open about three months). Thing was, she REALLY knew her stuff and sometimes she'd ask for things and about things that...frankly they had no idea what she was talking about. He asked me to help her out as I was the biggest Anime fan on staff (yes, of an Anime store).
I talked to her and tried to help her find what she was looking for. We hit it off right away. She was smart, funny, indeed very knowledgable, and while I wouldn't say this to anyone else at the time, downright adorable. Over the next year she came in regularly and we spoke often, becoming as much friends as customer and retailer. We often joked about meeting outside the store to watch Anime together and compare notes.
Then something changed. One day I was out sick, rare for me, and she asked my co-workers if she could get my home number 'cause she was worried about me. I was so greatful and talking to her actually made me feel better (or at least less depressed and anxious, which used to happen whenever I got sick). Not too long after, on a very hot day, she came into the store with a Ramune (Japanese Soda) and had one for me as well. My co-workers and boss teased her for not 'bringing enough for the whole class'. I remember she blushed, honestly embarrased, and I knew why she'd brought one for me specifically. It was clear we both really liked each other.
About a month later we got together for that Anime watch and it turned into a first date. That turned into 'going steady' and a year after that we were living together. We stayed together for about 10 1/2-11 years, 4 of which we spent married.
At some point pretty early on I convinced her to try RPGs. She already read a lot of Fantasy novels, liked Sci-Fi and Fantasy movies, read X-Men, watched Anime and read Manga. She even wrote Fan Fiction and original short stories. She had all the interests and talents of a great gamer but hadn't gamed. We fixed that, first with classic Traveller, Mage, and Ars Magica, and then eventually AD&D 1E. Yep. I adored her so much I was willing to run D&D. That's love brother.
Our first trip together was GenCon, the one where 3rd Edition made its debut. He attended a few after that between other trips. She had a good job, made much more than me, and things were good for a long while. Until they weren't.
I have no interest or desire to regale you with what went wrong but by 2007 or so we were divorced and didn't talk for a while. It was a good two years or so. Maybe close to three. During those three years, I didn't play any RPGs. I couldn't. Gaming became something we did together; it was a shared passion. Without her I just couldn't find it in myself to enjoy the hobby and I wasn't feeling especially creative. My muse was gone. Thinking of gaming made me think of her and that just made me sad so...yeah.
After the three-year gap I started feeling like not gaming was doing more to put me in a sour state of mind than gaming without Selina, so I went to my FLGS to see if anyone I knew might be running or playing anything. That was tough too. For 10 years I had shopped at that store with her. The owners have known me since I was 14 and I know their family. Selina became part of that relationship so having to go in and explain why she wasn't with me...ugh.
Anyway, I sat on the sidelines of a game or two and then joined in on one or two and got to know some old friends all over again, plus meet some new ones. Eventually I offered to run Mutants and Masterminds and before I knew it I had a campaign with 9 players showing up on average. Never less than 7 and we maxed out at 11 for one or two sessions. It was here I met my dearly departed friend Dave Cotton and a few of the other guys who would become regulars at my tables for the next decade or so.
Eventually I got a call from Selina, who had opened up a Tutoring Center in Brooklyn specializing in helping ESL kids (English as a Second Language). Most, practically all, were Chinese and the Center was near Brooklyn's Chinatown. She asked me to help teach the kids on weekends using...Tabletop RPGs. She had this idea and when she explained it to me I immediately started spitballing on how we could pull it off. She loved the idea and I ended up working for her for a few years. Unfortunately the Pandemic hit and it was no longer viable to operate that way we had been. Selina moved to an online model but it was difficult for me as working at the Center gave me less time to build my own business. Reluctantly we parted ways once again but stayed in touch.
It's been a while since we've spoken, a few months or so I think, but we're still friends. She is unlike anyone I have ever met, strengths and flaws included, and I feel (hope) we'll always be friends in some capacity. She was my first true love and while I've met some truly wonderful women since, I will likely always see Selina as the one person in the world whose weirdness best matches my own . Maybe there is another. Time will tell.
In the meantime, I am still gaming and I really hope she gets to as well. She was and probably still is one of the greatest, if not the greatest, TRPG players I have ever known and just a truly good person.
Note: I wanted to put a picture of her while she was 'in the act' of gaming here but I couldn't find one where she actually appears to be playing. Most of the pics I have are just her laughing hysterically at the gaming table because, well, my Jersey Group. That pretty much explains everything.
You can see her character Ceren-Dee Windrake here.
Onward...
AD
Barking Alien

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