Tuesday, February 15, 2011

I'm Gonna Blast You Sucka!

As our episode continues we get down with our bad selves and make a plan. Vulpurra heads back to the ship to protect the crew while Prof. Tycho, Mira and Humperdink work on repairs. Meanwhile Supernova heads to the Pygmy Bugman village nearby to talk to its 'elder'. Turns out the leader of the tribe is a butterfly-like matriarch and if its female, well you know Supernova Brown can sweet talk it (Vulpurra appearing to be the only exception). Convincing the tribe to give him a scouting party to lead him to the enemy base, Supernova and a handful of Pygmy Bugmen head out.

Back at the Soul Flyer, the group is attacked and captured by the big bad ass Bugmen of Betelgeuse Prime who have discovered their ship and overwhelmed them with sheer numbers. Unbeknownst to the bad Bugs, Humperdink has eluded detection and sneaks off to find Supernova. Meanwhile the captured crew are loaded into a hover truck type vehicle and taken to the Bugmen's headquarters (that's one way to find the base! Sheeeit.).

On his way through the dense, alien jungle Supernova has a run in with one of the local fauna, the dreaded Wiretongued Turreting Mantis! Using its long, thin, flat and razor sharp 3 1/2 foot tongue and pivot jointed head, this living weed wacker tries to decapitate our hero but some kung fu action and fancy jet pack flying and the creature was finished. Supernova made a makeshift monowire whip out of the beasts tongue and started bookin' for the base. Yeah. He is just that bad a mo'fo.

Humperdink eventually finds Supernova and his Pygmy scout group and reveals what happened back at the ship. While Supernova insists the Pygmies head back as its now too dangerous, one Pygmy (who they named 'Steve') wants to stay to repay the life debt he owes Supernova for saving him from the Wiretongued Mantis. Humperdink than lets Supernova know about a new pistol he's been working on, the Oscillating Deciminator. Supernova is happy to hear it since one of his Dyn-o-Mite Ultra Beamers got destroyed battling the Mantis.

Ok, so Supernova, Humperdink and Steve the Pygmy Bugman approach the enemy base just as the hover truck containing the rest of the group drives up a hill toward the garage entrance. The truck is escorted by a bunch of Bugmen on hover cycles. Using the Wire-Whip-Tongue weapon, Supernova lasso's a rider off his cycle and steals it. As he rockets toward the truck his runs into a swarm of small, four legged insect-crustaceans that shock him and cause his vehicle to malfunction. Humperdink mentions running into the little critters earlier and they messed up his communicator and Compucorder (Tricorder meets hand held computer).

After a brief discussion and some experimenting, the team discovered the EM frequency that attracted the creatures (called
Nitpickers). By setting a communicator for the right frequency and throwing it, the Nitpickers will give chase and short circuit or screw up most of the tech in the vicinity of where it lands.

So...Supernova waits for the Bugmen to pull all their vehicles, including the truck with the 'prisoners', into the garage and then sets the communicator on his stolen hover cycle to emit the right frequency, then sets the bike to autopilot and sends it careening into the garage. Dozens and dozens of Nitpickers pour out of the jungle and fill the garage causing all many of havoc. Lights go on and off (mostly off), doors fly open or jam shut, weapons fail, vehicles go dead, etc.

Amid the chaos, Supernova, Humperdink and Steve rush in. Two Bugmen come out of the truck with the heroes inside and then a third is suddenly hurled out the door with a go-go boot imprint on his chest. Vulpurra pops out and starts wailing on the stunned insect soldiers. Supernova acquires another hover cycle, this one deactivated during the initial wave of Nitpickers and thereby spared. Using it he navigated the huge hangar like garage and took out a number of Bugmen including a commander type and a big bruiser type.

Humperdink located a secret hatch to an underground starship hangar whose bay doors were hidden behind a waterfall. In their supply depot area he found an Aetheric Stabilizer, which the team immediately loaded onto a Betelgeusen spaceship they found. Before leaving, Supernova instructed Humperdink and Prof. Tycho to get into the base's computer system and make their primary communication unit (a big 70's radar dish looking thing on the roof) emit the same Nitpicker summoning signal. Soon the entire base was overrun by thousands of the little gremlins, causing untold amounts of damage and discord.

The group lands the Betelgeusen ship next to the Soul Flyer, gets on board and quickly installs the new stabilizer. Humperdink apologizes to the ship for leaving it to which the ship replies, "Ain't no thing little man. Why it ain't no thing but a chicken wing." Powered up and ready to go, the team says goodbye and thanks to Steve and says they'll be back since they never found the secret weapon they were originally looking for. The camera pulls back, back, back until the image is on a TV screen/monitor in a dark room where a very short man (almost a child) and a beautiful black woman in a Ming the Merciless type outfit view the events surrounded by Bugmen.

"Oh yes Supernova Brown...we'll see each other again soon. Very soon."

Dig It!

Barking Alien

Watch this blog for the last notes on my epic Blaxploitation Sword and Planet adventure complete with some character write-ups and artwork. Catch you on the flipside.


  1. Wait... This is happening? I suppose that the Red Dwarf has helped prepare my brain, as there is only minor short-out. :D

  2. Already happened.

    It was a one-shot I ran this past Sunday (Feb. 13th, 2011 for posterity).

  3. Well that's what I meant, even if I did mess up the tense :).

  4. Brilliant. As far as artwork goes, I'd love to see a movie poster for this.